Posts Tagged ‘life’

The prominent gray

white and blue of the supermarket gives

     way to your familiar faces.

We confront each other with casual friendship.

The words

from your tongue

      are the usual sharp, sour curses mixed in

            to everyday dialogue.

your beards are genitals

sewn onto your faces.

One of you

       is still pubescent, though

      really having just entered adulthood.

We talk.

One of you barely whispers that I’m “…a

       pussy, right?”

One of you comments how there will be nothing to do but

“drink and fuck” where I’m going.

     I almost want to say 

     “just like you do?” and bring up your girlfriends.

What do they see in you?

      And you can go breathe in cancer,

meanwhile I can feel my heart

is ten times heavier than both of yours,

          ten times larger.

That nonchalance,

      that callousness,

that you two possess

is not something I wish to be cursed with,

and I feel more mature than both of you.

     I feel older-

     responsible.

I unwittingly comprehend,

      I have something to live for.

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Life is different for me

because I give a damn

because my metaphorical heart

is an eye that wants to take everything in

because I wade up to my knees before

I fully submerge

because sunlight is always gold

because there’s always wind

because when I hear the rain slam against my house at midnight

I wear a white t-shirt and walk under the storm 

because green is life

and it’s my favorite color

We are all shoved under the microscope.

We are each choked by leashes of wire.

We’ve spent years within stores,

at garage sales, perusing someone else’s memories,

because what we have isn’t good enough.

In the end, the “good citizens” are the ones that don’t acknowledge the surveillance.

In the end, the ones that speak up

cause change.

“Reality has a funny way of contradicting our firmly held beliefs.”

~from Yangki Christine Akiteng.

I like this quote, because it can be so true.

I wish I could get away

from all the distress,

all the pressure,

all the uncertainty.

I wish I had the means to

simply leave

and find a quiet place

where I could stop and look,

not think, just observe,

leaving all familiar faces behind me.

I wish I could find a place

where I wouldn’t have to worry

about being found

because I wouldn’t be lost, anyway.

I just want to find a place

where I have no past

and no future

to worry about.

Laughter and Love

of which I know not-

these amazing Gifts

to others are brought.

 

I stew under Gray,

I sigh in Quiet-

conceal this discontent,

knowing not how long

I may hide it.

Life stretches toward both horizons

The dog excitedly barks at children across the street

Wind stirs curtains, leaves

Spruce branches sway like green tentacles

Birds peel their old plumage and blow their flutes

The robin inflates its heart

Clouds coalesce and disperse like cottonwood seeds

Sky opens and closes its perforated maw

Hours are marked by color and the sun’s position

Rain falls

Horns blare

Sprouts greenly fork out of soil

Wind ebbs and flows

Flowers brighten

Each horizon darkens to be lit again